Review: Fun Factory Amor

My first ever review, featuring my first dildo! It felt appropriate.

The Fun Factory Amor is black, stubby, and comes with a suction cup, in case you’ve ever wanted to use a dildo as a coat hook on your wall (I have absolutely done this). It bends and squishes when you squeeze it. It’s a beautiful, attractive black (it also comes in a rosy sort of light pink) that lets me see all the cat hair that accumulates on it. It’s made of silicone and therefore body-safe. The curve and blunt head are elegant and minimalist: while you certainly couldn’t leave it out and claim it was ‘art’, it’s clear that thought was put into its shape. It’s relatively small and manageable at 1.4″ diameter and 5″ insertable.

All of these words sounded like a perfect first-ever dildo to a college student with no experience and a little spending money. I watched my email obsessively for tracking and shipping updates, and I was thrilled when it finally came. That made it all the more disappointing when I realized that the silicone was draggy, scrapey, and entirely not worth the effort it takes to make masturbating even a slightly pleasurable experience.

Seriously, I smear lube onto this thing, already warmed up and aroused with a nice vibrator on my clit, and I can still barely get it into me, let alone move it. It’s something to clench around, but that’s the highest bar it clears. I generally just shove it in after lubing it up, leave it there, and let it fill me up (and then leave it in entirely too long because I dread taking it out). On the positive side, it’s squishy and vaguely pleasant to clench around as long as I do not, under any circumstances, try to thrust it. At that point it’s just distracting.

If the Amor were cast in a different finish (I’ve heard tell of glorious glossy finishes on dildos and really want to get my hands on one), it would be my favorite dildo. Unfortunately, it isn’t, and that ruins any hope the shape had for me. I don’t want to apply a boatload of lube to one dildo just to make it move without ruining my masturbation session. “Technically there” isn’t enough for me to recommend this dildo, unless for some reason you have always wondered what it’s like to fuck yourself with very, very lightly textured sandpaper.

If for some reason you want to try this dildo, it’s available in black or pink at Shevibe.